Sunday, February 8, 2009

Oh, Sheetballs, Batman.

Dear Dissertation,

First of all, let me say that I'm proud of you, and I think you've accomplished some wonderful things in the past few months. I just wanted you to know that before I give you the following news: you're axed, baby. Fired, canned, disowned, let go, and deep-sixed. Turns out somebody already wrote a book about you, only your silly researcher never found that book until just this month.

Don't fear, Dissertation. I know you won't be unemployed for long. I have convened a special council of advisors, and we are rapidly formulating a re-training program, so hopefully with your newly acquired skills and focus you'll be back to work in no time. I mean, that, I really do. Just consider this a temporary setback. A mini-break, if you will.

Hasta la victoria siempre!

Cheastypants

11 comments:

Kate said...

I am sure that the sick feeling that I just got in the pit of my stomach is nothing compared to the one you must have had.

So sorry! Onward and upward!!

Frank Irwin said...

Ouch! Sorry to hear about that, Miss Pants.

I knew of a grad student who had his thesis spread about his office, and the cleaning crew threw it out. He ended up just going straight to his PhD.

You'll probably find a better dissertation topic...

Anonymous said...

Your dissertation has been around the block.... BAD dissertation!

-Cookie

Renny said...

I actually have comments for Frank Irwin. 1) I love your photo. 2) Did you know that there is a huge building with your name on it in Austin? You should demand free tickets to all the events there.


Oh, and Cheastypants, don't worry. No one read that silly book anyways, which means that it DOESN'T EXIST. Ta-da, problem solved!

Cheasty said...

all - thanks for the words of support and encouragement. lucky for me, i am the bounce-back queen and all will be well pronto, i just know it!

and frank irwin... are you THE frank irwin?! gasp!

Cheasty said...

all - thanks for the words of support and encouragement. lucky for me, i am the bounce-back queen and all will be well pronto, i just know it!

and frank irwin... are you THE frank irwin?! gasp!

Frank Irwin said...

Thanks, Rennie, that photo shows how I feel most of the time.

And, yes, I am the Frank Irwin, but not THE Frank Erwin, although I often get phone calls for that place.

Frank Irwin said...

Oops. Sorry, Renny.

Renny said...

That's OK, Frank Erwin.

Frank Irwin said...

Touche, Renny!

EM said...

seriously? what are you going to do?