Today on the on-going series of "I Love This Joke," I'd like to share with you a joke I first learned when I was 10 or 11 from my family's hairdresser Jerry. He cut all our hair for years (at least until I was 22), and while I'd like to blame him for my Jordan Knight haircut (ah, middle school, how I miss thee), it really wasn't his fault at all. I asked for it.
Ok, here's the joke. Warning: the build-up is interminable, but the punchline is totally worth it.
This hairdresser was going to a hairdressers' convention one day. He packed up a suitcase with his tools and some snazzy new products he wanted to show off, tossed his stuff in the trunk of his car, and took off for the day. An hour or two into his trip, the hairdresser is getting a little bored, when on the side of the road, he sees a hitchhiker. Brilliant! Company! So he pulls over and gives the guy a lift. They chat about inconsequential things, what do you do for a living, where are you going, etc, when all of the sudden, WHAM! A rabbit runs out in front of the car and gets creamed.
"Oh, boy," says the hitchhiker. "That's unfortunate."
"Never fear!" replies the hairdresser. "I know just how to fix this."
The hitchhiker is a little confused, considering the rabbit is pretty much VERY VERY dead, but he stays quiet and waits to see what the hairdresser does. The hairdresser pulls over on the side of the road, gets out of the car, opens the trunk, and gets a spray bottle out of his suitcase.
Oh, dear, thinks the hitchhiker. I'm with the crazy guy. "Hey, dude? What are you doing? That rabbit is dead, man, let's just keep going!"
The hairdresser smiles at him and says, "Just hold on, I know exactly what I'm doing."
He walks over to the dead rabbit and sprays it a couple of times with the spray bottle. Nothing happens. He walks around it, sprays once over here, once more over there. Just as the hitchhiker is starting to back away slowly, the dead rabbit starts to twitch.
"Holy shit!" the hitchhiker cries out. "The rabbit's moving!"
The hairdresser sprays it a few more times, and the rabbit suddenly jumps up, hops away three times, turns around, and waves back at the two guys. Hops three times, turns around and waves. Hops three times, turns around and waves. He keeps doing this until he disappears in the woods.
The hitchhiker is completely stupefied, shocked, and a little scared. "Dude! What the heck were you spraying on that dead rabbit?!"
"Oh, nothing," replied the hairdresser. "Just a little hare reviver and a permanent wave."